Alone Time vs. Family Time

As a stay-at-home mom, I sometimes need a break from the family.  At least I thought I did.  When the kids were younger and we were living in California, Michael used to take care of the kids at night and I would go to a cafe or I would go out with girlfriends.  This progressed to my going out by myself in the middle of the day, when I could actually enjoy the daylight without two kids hanging onto me.

The time alone was refreshing ... to a degree.  I remember missing the children just a little bit, but enjoying my time off.  When I would return, however, I felt the need to have even more alone time.  I don't know if this meant that I needed more alone time in general or if it was maybe futile at that time of the kids' development to "sever the tether."  The kids at the time were going to need me and clamor for my attention so any homecoming was going to be difficult.

Here in Tampa I recently needed alone time but the only time available was at night - when I was too tired to travel to a measly Starbucks cafe or to even try a new sushi place.  One weekend Michael asked what I wanted to do and I declared that I wanted to go to Clearwater Beach and dine at an establishment right on the water or on the sand in hopes of experiencing the laziness I sense in the song "Margaritaville."    Well Michael delivered and we enjoyed it immensely.

The view as one approaches Clearwater  Beach.

Lazy shopping available!!!

Ask Michael and ye shall receive!

Michael took us to the restaurant Frenchy's that sat right on the sand with a view of volleyball players and sunbathers.  Oh yeah ... and the water, clouds and horizon.  A plus about our table was that we plopped the kids over the guardrail to let them play while we waited for our food.  

"I'm not hungry!" means I'm more interested in playing.

After brunch, we played in the sand and surf for a while.  I realized that the kids were not experienced with waves because they didn't brace themselves as the rushing water crashed into them.  These weren't big waves at all;  they couldn't have been taller than 1 foot.  But in comparison to what they usually see at Snug Harbor, the waves here were gigantic. 

We didn't stay long, not because of the dark clouds clustering above us, but because Michael and I were tired of hanging out in the sun.  The kids, however, could have stayed there all day!

For the rest of the weekend, we did no work on the bus, we lounged around the house, napped, and ate & drank well.  This made me so happy and content!  I didn't want to be away from the family anymore.  I realized that I need some relaxation time - period.  Alone time definitely affords the relaxation I need, but so does lax family time.  I spend so much time with the family cleaning, washing, and disciplining. These are not a few of my favorite things and can thus easily associate the family with these unpleasant chores.  When I relax with them I'm able to associate positives with being around the family.  

Don't get me wrong.  I still need alone time.  I just now know that it is not the only answer to leisure.